Pooh, the teddy bear says to his best friend Piglet, “Any day spent with you is my favorite day. So, today is my new favorite day”. Time is the best gift one can give for someone they care for. Caught in the hectic whirlwind of activities, parents are always busy trying to meet deadlines, doing household chores, and socializing that it becomes difficult to spend quality time with children. Even stay-at-home-parents do not have enough time to spare for their sons and daughters. At the same time, parents around the world vouch for children to be their highest absolute priority in life. Ready to spend as much money as they want to meet their child’s requirements, parents often miss out on the one thing that matters the most – their time.
A busy schedule and a steady job can pay bills and satisfy their ‘wants’, but children ‘need’ parents’ attention and presence more than anyone else’s. We will tell you why:
The modern world runs on the fuels of hard work, commitment, and performance. So if you are feeling guilty for spending more time at the office than with your children, here is some good news. It is not how many hours you spend with them that counts, but how you spend it. Here are some tips for you to on spending quality time with children
You might find your child’s games boring or too childish for you. But from their perspective, this is one area where they will have more fun if you join them. Let them take you into their world. Let them be the leaders for you to follow. Ask them questions and let them know that you are genuinely interested in playing with them. For example, learn to play the video games you bought for them. Your losses could be their wins, but as long as you have set your limits, be silly and have fun with them.
One major reason why parents do not find time to spend with their children is because of the chores they have to do. A possible solution is to get them involved with your work so that they feel they are part of a team. This time could be made enjoyable with some upbeat music or narration of an interesting story. It eventually makes them feel proud and responsible for their family. Even if it is to repair a leaky faucet or change a tire, combined efforts offer bonus chances for you to spend time with your child.
Roll up your sleeves and clear the desk. Crafting with kids is one of the best ways to get to know them. Your end product need not be complicated or picture-perfect. Even a simple DIY task can be fun if you can build it up together. For example, the whole family can sit down together to make the season’s greeting cards. Children are naturally creative so these activities engage their attention and develop their teamwork skills. Remember to keep all the supplies ready so that you and your child can relax in each other’s company.
Going out for evening walks in the most comfortable clothes can make a world of difference for you and your child. It allows them to be free, spontaneous and is a great way to spend time together. As they notice things and people along the way, you can have interesting conversations and lessons to learn. The independence they experience outside makes them calmer, happier and improves their concentration. They also tend to open up to you during this time, giving you a piece of their minds. Walking is also a great regular exercise and a better alternative to watching TV. This can be a good way to spend quality time with children.
Cooking with your child gives you the time to interact while making a dish that you both cherish. If you have a family recipe to pass down or some handy tricks of cooking, this is the best time to share those precious gems. It also encourages the child to prioritise health over processed and junk food. Moreover, if he or she is given a chance to “critique” the food item, it aids their analytical skills and builds honesty in the relationship. Remember to make the cooking process safe and teach them table manners. The aim is to make the child aware of his contributions towards his family.
If there is no way you can spend time with your children but want to let them know that you care, surprise them with little things. Write notes and drop them on their study table or lunch box. Notes that reassure your love bring them closer and make up for your absence in a small way. You could also record a short video of what you want to convey and hand it over to them. Adopt creative ways to make them feel loved and cared for.
Every family has some history with interesting stories. Find time to sit down with your child and narrate them. Look through family albums and introduce people or incidents they may not know of. You can also add new pictures to the collection and make it a regular activity. When a child is proud of his roots, he bonds with the other family members and develops confidence. Your stories can teach him about his identity, cultivate empathy, inspire, develop self-reliance and even make him laugh! Make sure you answer his questions and have fun in the process.
Do you and your child share some common interests? Pick them up and engage in that activity together. It could be joining a karate class, doing yoga, learning to do DIY crafts or a new language. Learning something new opens up more ways of communication, brings interest in the conversations and binds you closer. Parent and the child end up on the same page as both go through the same processes of learning – struggling, practicing and mastering. It allows you the time to get to know each other better.
What do celebrations and festive seasons mean to your children? Sweets, gifts, traditions and above all, fun time with family. Irrespective of whether it’s a birthday, anniversary or religious festival, celebrations begin weeks beforehand. Take children on your shopping spree, involve them in every step of preparation and indulge in their contributions. You can even customise the traditions and make it unique every year. You can also take your child outside the family and participate in the communal celebrations. Remember that your child deserves a happy childhood with your active participation.
Children need some relief from the daily schedule of school and home. If you cannot take them out even on weekends, make sure that you opt for monthly excursions. Make each trip different from the other and make your child look forward to them. You could alternate between educational and recreational destinations like museums, theme parks, etc. Get your child to help you with the planning, considering the time, mode of transport, budget and so on. Through this, he or she understands your efforts and will appreciate the quality time more.
If you are unable to spend a whole day with your child, try to be with them at the beginning and ending of every day. Maybe you can do stretches together for ten minutes in the morning. You could brush teeth together or induce them into helping you make breakfast. Similarly, at the end of the day, after dinner, have some time to sit together and talk about each other’s day. You could read a chapter of a book together or meditate before both of you retire to bed.
Be it candid pictures or selfies, photographs are reminders of beautiful moments spent with your loved ones. Keep adding to your family album with photos of informal gatherings, family dinner, trips, etc. so that your child appreciates the coming together. Sometimes it makes all the difference in the world when they look back on memories and realise where they belong. It provides the reassurance that children sometimes need.
While action speaks for itself, it is not always the case. It is important for him or her to have your trust and reassurance so that they know they are not alone during hard times. Children can pick up messages from your little actions of care and concern, but sometimes you need to verbally tell them that you love them. It makes a tremendous impact on them as they gain courage, hope and confidence from your words.
Mistakes need correction and good deeds need appreciation. Your words of acknowledgment are vital in shaping their attitude. For example, if your child completes a task without your asking, do not leave out the chance to appreciate them so that they behave the same way in the future.
Parents involuntarily try to wipe out the silliness of children while training them to be responsible adults. At the same time, if you can embrace that silliness and be a part of it, it can have positive ramifications on them. It gives them a sense of comfort and safety that they only feel with their peers. They cope better with stress and are prompted to make healthy choices.
It is impossible to quit your job to make time for your child. But the good news is that the quality of the time matters more than the amount of time spent with them. Studies show that children who spend time with guilt-ridden and stressed parents have negative effects on them. Instead, meaningful and relaxed time influences them positively. Ensure that you can connect with your child during the small time you invest in them.
Sometimes lessons at school are carried forward to home to a great extent that children do not have time for anything else. Winmore Academy, one of the best schools in the country, ensures that the students get to enjoy their life both inside and outside the school. We believe in a strong parent-child relationship and its impact on their growth. Our curriculum and programmes are designed in such a way that parents can equally participate in the child’s development process and spend time with them. Your today’s presence will give you the space in their memories tomorrow.
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